You Can Never Get Enough Teasers for "American Horror Story: Freak Show"

Another day, another extremely spooky teaser for American Horror Story: Freak Show. In this one, which follows the demon hand and the three-legged acrobat, a human-like figure can be seen crammed in a cage while a second human-like figure with finger tattoos strokes the cage lovingly. Cool! JK, not cool, everything is so scary.

The Hollywood Reporter also has a first look at the cast in their full Freak Show regalia, and it's positively wonderful. Sarah Paulson is near the top as conjoined twins Bette and Dot, while Kathy Bates makes an appearance as the Bearded Lady. "It's darker than Coven," Ryan Murphy told THR. "It feels very unique." Um, no kidding.

And if that's still not enough AHS for you, here's another teaser that will forever ruin the appeal of lollipops:

[via Entertainment Weekly]

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12 Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Person

1. "Oooh, you're getting BIG." (In a terrible singsongy voice.) 
You're probably just referring to my belly, which really is getting big. There's a baby in there, and she might become the president or marry Prince George or be a ballerina, or all three, and it's wonderful! But pregnant people already feel large, because they're actually two people. So as a golden rule, just avoid the word "big" and let the words "tiny" and "Gisele" flow freely. 

2. "So… how much have you gained?"
Some people actually think a fun conversation topic would be disclosing how much weight you've gained. In what world?! I fully understand that a healthy pregnancy means gaining weight. But that doesn't mean I am excited about disclosing the precise numerical value of my all-time high number on the scale like some sort of reverse Biggest Loser finale.

3. [Leaving an emoji whale as a comment on one of my Instagrams.]
My brother did this recently, as a joke. Although I actually found it hilarious, as the whale emoji is underused, I still wouldn't advise it, generally speaking.

4. "Is that for YOU?" (While gazing at my beer.)
Yes, hostess at brunch, this apple-flavored craft beer is for me. It's one of the occasional beers I feel completely comfortable drinking, thanks to my doctor and various studies… and the fact that my grandmother drank occasional beers while pregnant with seven different children and they're all totally fine. Based on your condescending stare, you'd think I was Betty Draper resting a martini on my belly and smoking a cigarette. I'm saving that for post-birth, y'all!

5. "I really hope you're being careful."
So said a condescending fellow rider after spin class. Then, through gritted teeth, added, "because I had some complications."  As much as I value advice from perfect strangers about my health — oh wait, I don't care at all about advice from perfect strangers about my health. I'm spinning with the support of my doctor —the same way runners continue to run and yogis namaste onward while pregnant. So just let us big bitches be.

6. "You look ready."
This is the pregnancy equivalent of telling someone they look "tired," which is the equivalent of telling someone they have gray skin and dark circles, and generally look like shit. 

7. "Just (sleep/go to dinner/go to the movies/go on vacation) NOW while you still have the chance!"
I know people are just trying to be helpful and encourage me to really enjoy the freedom of not having a baby yet. But it's still annoying to imply that my husband and I will NEVER sleep/go to dinner/go to the movies or go on vacation EVER AGAIN IN OUR LIVES. I know I'll love my baby big time, but I also know that I will have no problem leaving her at her grandma's for the weekend sometimes while we sleep/go to dinner/go to the movies/go on vacation.

8. "So… was it planned?" 
This is almost as bad as asking someone if they had been "trying." Especially coming from old people, these are awkward veiled questions about a pregnant person's private sex and birth control habits. Which is to say: Ew. Just because someone is with child does not make these queries suddenly comfortable.

9. "If cavewomen gave birth without drugs, so can you."
This gem came courtesy of a lovely birthing class teacher who held up a droopy ski hat to illustrate what the uterus looks like. Anyway, I am aware that women have been giving birth — without epidurals — since time immemorial. But the same women also walked around with untreated broken legs and toothaches and died at age 35 because modern medicine didn't exist. Now that it does, I plan to take full advantage! I have great, non-cavewoman friends who gave birth naturally and that's awesome for them — but it's a personal choice and we shouldn't tell each other what to do with our droopy hats. 

10. "You should really breastfeed — for a full year."
Breast-is-best-shaming is at an all-time high right now. Not long ago, a person who I previously didn't know was dumb said that she read that feeding a baby formula is like giving him or her a cigarette. I haven't looked it up, but that that can't be true, because I was formula-fed and grew up to work at Cosmo. A woman's decision to breastfeed or formula feed — whether for a full year or not — is hers alone. Pregnant ladies are creating a new human life — we probably don't need any added pressure about what to do after that. 

11. "So you're going back to work full time, huh? Couldn't you go back part-time or something?"
Suggesting to a pregnant person that going back to work full-time means she already sucks as a mom, before she is even a mom, is a low blow. I guess technically I could "go to part-time or something" — if that's what I wanted to do. But what I want to do is go back full-time… so that's what I'm doing. But I will probably cry the first week I drop my baby off at daycare, if that makes you feel any better!

12. The word "pop."
"OMG you popped over vacation." "I can't wait for you to pop." "Welp, you finally popped!" Thinking of one's body as "popping" just reminds me of Violet Beauregarde from Willy Wonka inflating to become a human blueberry before… popping. Again, even if it's a lie, err on the safe side and just stick to: "You look tiny."

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Photo Credit: Universal Pictures

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10 Things You Should Never Say To Someone With Depression

1. “Everyone’s depressed.” No, everyone gets depressed sometimes. It’s normal to feel the repercussion of a bad day — when your boss yells at you and some guy you’re dating just said something marginally offensive over text (“aww you’re so cute!”) and your cat pooped in the shower. And those problems are real! But diagnosed depression is like any other physical illness that requires medication. Like, you wouldn’t say “Everyone has a thyroid problem.”

2. “Just look on the bright side! There are so many great things in your life!” This (many of these, actually) is obviously so well-intentioned that it’s hard to let this person down. Those people are approaching it as if you are looking at a plate of half kale (the good things) and half dog poop (the bad things), and choosing to focus on the dog poop instead of the kale. But depression is like if that dog came back and peed all over the whole plate, and then someone wrapped it in Saran Wrap so that you actually couldn’t access either the kale or the dog poop. In other words, it’s not like you’re deliberating all aspects of your life and deciding to be negative. It’s like a big blanket of exhaustion and sadness that covers the entire thing so you can’t even see the facts of your life for what they are.

3. “You don’t need to be on medication — it’s so overprescribed. Everyone’s on drugs these days.” Yeah, because the medical health world is realizing that mental illnesses are just as serious as physical ones. It’s easy to pass judgment on these kinds of medications because of a few college friends who managed to score recreational Adderall, but for every one of those, there are hundreds of people who have been pulled out of deep emotional and mental holes with the help of medication prescribed by good psychiatrists. You probably know some of them — you just don’t know you do. Basically it’s like saying we should eschew modern medicine in favor leeching and assuming that people are possessed by demons when they actually have syphilis. And you’re not even the sick person! Ugh, get off my lawn.

4. “You won’t be able to do anything creative if you take medication. You’ll be a zombie.” We’ve got Garden State to blame for this one. Thanks a whole lot, Zach Braff. Sure, I used to worry about that. But eventually it became so unbearable that I’d do anything to get better, and I write for a living, so that was a big risk. That should give people who don’t have depression some idea of how bad it can get. Actually, I’m way more productive at work when I’m not having obsessive circular negative thoughts and my mind is clear.

5. “A lot of people have it so much worse.” This falls into the category of “true, but not effective.” I mean, of course they do. In New York you can’t go a block without seeing that. But as the kale/dog poop/Saran wrap argument hopefully illustrates, this isn’t about weighing life circumstances and choosing to be sad. In fact, this actually makes some depressed people feel worse, like they’re privileged and ungrateful.

6. “Happiness is a choice.” Have you ever noticed that clinically depressed people — regardless of their lifestyle, their income, their gender, their location, their political or religious views — deal with the same feelings? I’m tired, my life has no meaning, I feel doomed, hopeless, worthless, and I’m not sure how much longer I can do this. You bore yourself with your own repetitive thoughts. It’s not like you’re enjoying or wallowing in your negative feelings. Nobody’s choosing to feel this way. And some depressed people can’t afford to stay home or afford medication or live in an area where mental illness is taboo.

7. “Do you have PMS?” DO NOT EVEN.

8. “All you need to do is exercise more.” Any decent shrink will tell you that exercise helps, since it triggers feel-good endorphins that help with depression. But full-on depression isn’t cured by exercise alone, and it’s not like depression is caused by a lack of physical activity. My depression and complete laziness are separate.

9. “You’re just being dramatic.” As Hyperbole and a Half’s Allie Brosh puts it in her fantastic two-parter about depression, it’s weird and scary to feel debilitating depression for no reason. It's not a moody, emo, "I wonder how many people think I'm super-cool because I'm staring out the window looking pensive and listening to sad music" kind of feeling. It's an incredibly unglamorous, "why am I crying in front of FedEx Kinkos, I haven't washed my hair in five days, I'm tired of living" kind of feeling.

10. "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Obviously this is someone who cares and means well — but as far as depression goes, what doesn't kill you really sucks, tells you to shower way less than you should, and hopefully, if you see someone for help and take care of yourself, goes away eventually. (It does.)

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Via Getty

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Carine Roitfeld Never Calls Herself Feminist

What's the difference between sexy and skanky? "I think the problem of the world is sexy changed a bit. When I started 20 years ago, 30 years ago, sexy [had a] very different meaning from today," said Carine Roitfeld, global fashion director of Harper's Bazaar and editor of CR Fashion Book, at the unveiling of a new Mercedes in Lincoln Center's fashion week tents. "Now 'sexy' is trashy, it's not very beautiful — it's on the limit of vulgar," added Roitfeld, who some still call the "Queen of Porno Chic" (though she prefers "Erotic Chic"), because of her provocative fashion editorials. "I¹m very covered! Not to show everything, that¹s my idea of sexy today."

Roitfeld added that "feminist" is still not in her vocabulary. "I love if someone invites me to a restaurant so I don¹t know if that¹s a feminist," she said, in her accented English. "But I really believed in the word in Europe — I don¹t know what you call it in America — matriarchal. You know it¹s very important, the role of a mother… I don¹t know but it¹s feminism to me to love your kids."

At the premiere of Mademoiselle C. in New York Friday night, Roitfeld also brought up motherhood during interviews on the red carpet. "She's a very very good mother," Roitfeld said of Vogue editor-in-chief Anna Wintour, when reporters prodded about their alleged rivalry. "When my kids came to New York in the beginning she was very nice with them and she'd invite them for lunch or dinner. This we never forget. It's a mother complicity and I like that."

Roitfeld recently put new mom Kim Kardashian on the cover of CR Fashion Book, but said she couldn't foresee featuring her baby, North. "It's not Momma. Maybe another magazine. I love babies," she explained. Despite all the flack Kim receives for not being "high fashion" — fueled undoubtedly by the floral dress she wore to this year's Met Gala, prompting the entire internet to "compare her to a couch" — Roitfeld said that she "was very easy to work with. A very good model. "

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16 Things You Should Never Say Right After Sex

1. "The worst thing you can ever say or talk about to a guy after sex is mentioning anything remotely about, related to, or concerning his mother. It will deflate that mood in less than a nanosecond. Trust me, I'm guilty as charged." —Tanya T, 32

2. "'OK. You can leave now.' Kind of heartless. Also—bossy." —Amy Schoen, dating coach

3. "The morning after, I asked her if I was a good lover. She said I was 'definitely in the top 50!'" —Dan N, 32

4. "The worst thing a woman can say to a man after sex is, 'That was nice.' Sex isn't supposed to be 'nice'—it's sex. Anything short of 'wow' and a guy will think he didn't perform well." —Thomas Edwards, "The Professional Wingman" 

5. "I was in L.A. on a business trip. I met what I thought was my soulmate. Nuzzling up to her after our loving making session, basking in the glow of it, and I whispered in her ear, 'How was it for you?' She replied, 'Better than a root canal.'" —Jon D, 32

6. "Don't ask, 'We used a condom, right?' Women should know if they used a condom and most importantly you should always use a condom and never leave it up to him to decide. Also, don't ever say 'We need to talk'—I don’t care what it is you need to talk about, after sex is never the time to have one of 'those' talks." —Emily Morse, sexpert

7. "'We have to hurry, my boyfriend will be here soon.'" —Terri, 34

8. "Nothing. Saying nothing after sleeping with a new guy can lead you down the path of misunderstanding on anything from what works for you in bed to the status of your relationship. So whether you are feeling good, bad, or neutral about him (or the sex), be sincere, come from a place of good intention, and say something." —Erica Curtis, marriage and family therapist

9. "'That's not what I expected.' This line can be crushing because it hits at the core of a man's self-image." —William Cane, author of The Art of Kissing

10. "'If I were you, I would learn how to please a woman.'" —Kate, 26

11. "The worst thing a woman can say to a guy after sleeping with him is anything in comparison to anyone else she's been with. Guys don't want to hear any of that, good or bad. As a couple's therapist, I've seen this cause unnecessary fights and relationship trouble—keep your focus on him!" —Rachel Thomasian, marriage and family therapist

12. "'I love you.' This happened to me during my college years and made things very awkward since we just started seeing each other." —Chau N, 27

13. "Never say, 'I wish you could've lasted longer.' This will only add pressure, it won't solve the problem." —Adam LoDolce, dating expert

14. "I met this much younger, naïve guy after a breakup. He’d only had brief sexual encounters with two women previously. We started playing around and I simply started giving him a handjob. He exploded within seconds, and there was a lake of cum on his stomach, and I said without hesitation 'Wow…Don’t you ever play with yourself?'" —Jen, 35

15. "Do not fish for compliments on your sexual performance. It appears needy, which is a turn off for guys, and the last thing that a man wants to do after sex is try to appease your insecurities." —Nikki Ransom, Certified sex therapist

16. "This one’s easy: 'I love you but I’m not in love with you.' It’s a non-sensical and meaningless phrase which hurts, but doesn’t clarify anything. It also indicates that the sayer of it doesn’t have a clue what love is—not that anyone can define love for the rest of us." —Russell Friedman, author of Moving On: Dump Your Relationship Baggage and Make Room for the Love of Your Life

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Photo: HBO

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10 Things You Should Never Say About Your Ex

1. The sex was bad.

Unless your man just lay there like a dead fish every time you got busy, how good he was in bed is completely subjective. But even if his performance was abysmally brief and his idea of foreplay felt like aliens probing your ladyparts, just keep your observations to yourself. (Russell Brand could have certainly used this advice when he blasted his sex life with ex Katy Perry this week—bad form, brah.)

2. He was broke.

Everyone has a different lifestyle and just because he couldn't match yours, that doesn't mean he's a bad guy—or even cheap. Don't sound high maintenance by complaining about his lack of funds.

3. Everything he thought/did/said was terrible.

Even though you broke up, you shouldn't systematically annihilate of every good thing he did or every good time you had. If someone brings up a great memory of the two, take a deep breath and avoid the urge to say, "Yeah, but what about the time he did [insert something horrible here]." And definitely don't badmouth your ex to the max in front of your new man. If your current BF thinks you may still have strong—even strongly negative—feelings for your past guy, he may wonder if you've actually moved on. 

4. He was always a jerk.

Well, then why did you date him for X number of months or even years? Saying this just makes you look bad, and worse, bitter. Sure, it's always important to look back and see if there were any red flags you missed—so you can be well aware of what to look for next time—but you don't need to broadcast all the warning signs to everyone you know.

5. You still love him.

We all go through heartache and have experienced a breakup. Telling anyone that you still love him will only prolong the healing. Fake it till you make it. Reframe this to something like, "We had a good run, and I wish him the best." Even if you don't.

6.Anything super embarrassing about your ex.

If you're willing to share awful story after awful story about your ex, what does this say to your pals or your current man?

7. Anything he told you in absolute confidence.

In that same vein, don't show you're untrustworthy by spilling major secrets about your ex's family, childhood, what have you. However bitterly things ended, the fact is that you were in an intimate relationship with this person. Often, because he's an "ex" you may rationalize that any oaths made are off the table but keeping promises and living with integrity is just a good way to lead your life.

8. Qualities that you loved about your ex.

Some people have the opposite problem when it comes to exes and find themselves gushing about the awesome things he did, gifts he gave you, how he made you feel special, blah blah blah. For the sake of any new relationship you might be forming, and your own sanity, get your mind—and mouth—out of the past.

9. How much your parents loved him.

When you take a new guy to meet your folks, don't prime him by comparing how your exes fared with your family—especially if your mom and dad loved someone you previously dated. The guy is probably nervous enough trying to live up to your (and their) expectations—he doesn't need the ghost of your ex-bf taunting him, too.

10. Negative qualities your ex had that your current guy has.

If you really want to piss your current boyfriend off, mention that something he does that you totally hate reminds you of your ex. This kind of comment never leads to anything positive, trust us.

Sources: Communication, dating and relationship expert Rachel DeAlto and Sheri Meyers, Psy.D, L.M.F.T., author of Chatting or Cheating: How to Detect Infidelity, Rebuild Love and Affair-Proof Your Relationship

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Photo: Getty Images

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10 Things You Should Never Say About Your Ex

1. The sex was bad.

Unless your man just lay there like a dead fish every time you got busy, how good he was in bed is completely subjective. But even if his performance was abysmally brief and his idea of foreplay felt like aliens probing your ladyparts, just keep your observations to yourself. (Russell Brand could have certainly used this advice when he blasted his sex life with ex Katy Perry this week—bad form, brah.)

2. He was broke.

Everyone has a different lifestyle and just because he couldn't match yours, that doesn't mean he's a bad guy—or even cheap. Don't sound high maintenance by complaining about his lack of funds.

3. Everything he thought/did/said was terrible.

Even though you broke up, you shouldn't systematically annihilate of every good thing he did or every good time you had. If someone brings up a great memory of the two, take a deep breath and avoid the urge to say, "Yeah, but what about the time he did [insert something horrible here]." And definitely don't badmouth your ex to the max in front of your new man. If your current BF thinks you may still have strong—even strongly negative—feelings for your past guy, he may wonder if you've actually moved on. 

4. He was always jerk.

Well, then why did you date him for X number of months or even years? Saying this just makes you look bad, and worse, bitter. Sure, it's always important to look back and see if there were any red flags you missed—so you can be well aware of what to look for next time—but you don't need to broadcast all the warning signs to everyone you know.

5. You still love him.

We all go through heartache and have experienced a breakup. Telling anyone that you still love him will only prolong the healing. Fake it till you make it. Reframe this to something like, "We had a good run, and I wish him the best." Even if you don't.

6.Anything super embarrassing about your ex.

If you're willing to share awful story after awful story about your ex, what does this say to your pals or your current man?

7. Anything he told you in absolute confidence.

In that same vein, don't show you're untrustworthy by spilling major secrets about your ex's family, childhood, what have you. However bitterly things ended, the fact is that you were in an intimate relationship with this person. Often, because he's an "ex" you may rationalize that any oaths made are off the table but keeping promises and living with integrity is just a good way to lead your life.

8. Qualities that you loved about your ex.

Some people have the opposite problem when it comes to exes and find themselves gushing about the awesome things he did, gifts he gave you, how he made you feel special, blah blah blah. For the sake of any new relationship you might be forming, and your own sanity, get your mind—and mouth—out of the past.

9. How much your parents loved him.

When you take a new guy to meet your folks, don't prime him by comparing how your exes fared with your family—especially if your mom and dad loved someone you previously dated. The guy is probably nervous enough trying to live up to your (and their) expectations—he doesn't need the ghost of your ex-bf taunting him, too.

10. Negative qualities your ex had that your current guy has.

If you really want to piss your current boyfriend off, mention that something he does that you totally hate reminds you of your ex. This kind of comment never leads to anything positive, trust us.

Sources: Communication, dating and relationship expert Rachel DeAlto and Sheri Meyers, Psy.D, L.M.F.T., author of Chatting or Cheating: How to Detect Infidelity, Rebuild Love and Affair-Proof Your Relationship

Want more from Natasha? Follow her on Twitter or find her on Facebook.

Photo: Getty Images

From Cosmopolitan.com. Visit Handbags reviews and advice for best reference here

16 Things You Should Never Say Right After Sex

1. "The worst thing you can ever say or talk about to a guy after sex is mentioning anything remotely about, related to, or concerning his mother. It will deflate that mood in less than a nanosecond. Trust me, I'm guilty as charged." —Tanya T, 32

2. "'OK. You can leave now.' Kind of heartless. Also—bossy." —Amy Schoen, dating coach

3. "The morning after, I asked her if I was a good lover. She said I was 'definitely in the top 50!'" —Dan N, 32

4. "The worst thing a woman can say to a man after sex is, 'That was nice.' Sex isn't supposed to be 'nice'—it's sex. Anything short of 'wow' and a guy will think he didn't perform well." —Thomas Edwards, "The Professional Wingman" 

5. "I was in L.A. on a business trip. I met what I thought was my soulmate. Nuzzling up to her after our loving making session, basking in the glow of it, and I whispered in her ear, 'How was it for you?' She replied, 'Better than a root canal.'" —Jon D, 32

6. "Don't ask, 'We used a condom, right?' Women should know if they used a condom and most importantly you should always use a condom and never leave it up to him to decide. Also, don't ever say 'We need to talk'—I don’t care what it is you need to talk about, after sex is never the time to have one of 'those' talks." —Emily Morse, sexpert

7. "'We have to hurry, my boyfriend will be here soon.'" —Terri, 34

8. "Nothing. Saying nothing after sleeping with a new guy can lead you down the path of misunderstanding on anything from what works for you in bed to the status of your relationship. So whether you are feeling good, bad, or neutral about him (or the sex), be sincere, come from a place of good intention, and say something." —Erica Curtis, marriage and family therapist

9. "'That's not what I expected.' This line can be crushing because it hits at the core of a man's self-image." —William Cane, author of The Art of Kissing

10. "'If I were you, I would learn how to please a woman.'" —Kate, 26

11. "The worst thing a woman can say to a guy after sleeping with him is anything in comparison to anyone else she's been with. Guys don't want to hear any of that, good or bad. As a couple's therapist, I've seen this cause unnecessary fights and relationship trouble—keep your focus on him!" —Rachel Thomasian, marriage and family therapist

12. "'I love you.' This happened to me during my college years and made things very awkward since we just started seeing each other." —Chau N, 27

13. "Never say, 'I wish you could've lasted longer.' This will only add pressure, it won't solve the problem." —Adam LoDolce, dating expert

14. "I met this much younger, naïve guy after a breakup. He’d only had brief sexual encounters with two women previously. We started playing around and I simply started giving him a handjob. He exploded within seconds, and there was a lake of cum on his stomach, and I said without hesitation 'Wow…Don’t you ever play with yourself?'" —Jen, 35

15. "Do not fish for compliments on your sexual performance. It appears needy, which is a turn off for guys, and the last thing that a man wants to do after sex is try to appease your insecurities." —Nikki Ransom, Certified sex therapist

16. "This one’s easy: 'I love you but I’m not in love with you.' It’s a non-sensical and meaningless phrase which hurts, but doesn’t clarify anything. It also indicates that the sayer of it doesn’t have a clue what love is—not that anyone can define love for the rest of us." —Russell Friedman, author of Moving On: Dump Your Relationship Baggage and Make Room for the Love of Your Life

Want more from Natasha? Follow her on Twitter or find her on Facebook.

Photo: HBO

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The Kate Moss Beauty Trick We Will Never, Ever Try

Korin Miller
Korin is the site director for Cosmopolitan.com. She loves uncovering cool new research and learning more about what makes guys tick. Outside the Cosmo office, you can find her running with her dog, trying to convince friends to go to karaoke bars, and watching as much reality TV as humanly possible. Hit her up on Twitter: @korinmiller
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Michelle Ruiz
Michelle is the news editor for Cosmopolitan.com. She's obsessed with interviewing celebrities and spotting the latest pop culture trends. Her life highlights include chatting with Ryan Gosling about sex dolls, dancing on stage at the Oprah show, and shopping with her mom on Long Island. Tweet her: @michelleruiz
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Dara Adeeyo
Dara is the associate web editor for Cosmopolitan.com. She's intrigued by all things digital. Dara loves playing with html and discovering new studies. When she's not reading up on the latest cocktail recipes (for work, of course), she can be found breaking it down on the dance floor or watching the Investigative Discovery channel. She also has a sick obsession with nail polish, elephants, and most importantly, Nutella. Dara basically lives on Twitter, so tweet at her and say hey: @dadeeyo.
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Elisa Benson
Elisa Benson is the senior editor of social media for @Cosmopolitan?so, yes, she tweets about sex for a living. Elisa grew up in Ohio, attended Colgate University, and wrote love and relationship advice for Seventeen before graduating to Cosmo. She lives for girly things (weddings and eyelash extensions and Pretty Little Liars?) and frequently tweets about all of the above: @elisabenson.
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Never Forget: The 90s Actually Happened

The 90’s were all that and a bag of chips. From overalls with one strap down to car phones to the Dick Tracy soundtrack, the decade was pretty much America’s golden age. Don’t agree? Talk to the hand. Below I round up the best dating shows of the 90’s for a reminder of the incredible fashion, music, and celebs of the day. Remember brown lipstick? Turtleneck crop tops? Carmen Electra? It’s so good/bad! Check it.

Studs - I was eight years old when this show first aired and I thought it was the sexiest thing since shirtless Prince Eric in the The Little Mermaid. The way the show works is that two guys, AKA studs, go out with three different women. Then they all gather on the show and try to guess what happened on the dates and who likes who. It’s like the game Clue but someone got fingered instead of murdered. Make sure to get a good look at the guy with the long curly perm and a lace-up Renaissance top in the clip. FASHION, you guys!

Best line from the clip - “Those hungry tiger eyes brought out the jungle beast in me.”

Singled Out - Dating is a numbers game. On Singled Out the show starts off with 50 horny singles competing for one special someone. The most important thing about this show is that it skyrocketed Jenny McCarthy to...actually what is she up to these days? Famous for her love of fart jokes and her Playboy looks she is basically Howard Stern’s dream girl. Jenny taught Americans that all it takes to get on TV is a huge gazongas and a terrible personality. Namaste.

Best line from clip - “Hi Michelle, My name is Tony, come to Boston, no bologna.” -

Change of Heart - Change of Heart is the Jerry Springer of dating shows. Every guest is like a feral animal who is THIS CLOSE to breaking some chairs or pulling some hair. In short, it’s fabulous television. The basic concept is that a (creepy) couple comes on the show and one of them goes on a date with a new person. Then all three gather on the couch for some real talk and the contestant decides if they want to stay in their original relationship or break up after ONE DATE with someone else. Nothing says class like dumping your partner on national TV after hooking up with a stranger. USA! USA! USA!

Best line from the clip - “He said he wanted me to meet his mom at his mom’s club and when we got there I didn’t realize it was a strip club. “

Bzzz! - This show was only on for a year because it was kind of boring and there were too many rules. Kind of like actual dating. Basically, a contestant has to choose between four people who are slowly eliminated through a series of ridiculous tests and questions. The best question from this clip is when the bachelorette asks a potential date, “Where are you taking me to our honeymoon?” Slow down girl! All you know about this dude is that he’s a bartender who waxes his eyebrows.

Best line from the clip - “I believe in everything; g-d, what horoscope tells me to do, ghosts. You name it, I believe it!”

Blind Date - Before OK Cupid and Match, the idea of going on a date with a total stranger was pure terror. Now, it’s just a Tuesday. On Blind Date, the producers set up two people who have never met and follow them around with a camera all night. Then they playback the date on TV adding funny commentary in the form of subtitles, animations, and thought bubbles. In the below clip, a woman gets matched up on date with a guy wearing a leopard fedora, a neck-scarf and a red jumpsuit. We can’t blame the 90’s for that fashion, that's all him.

Best line from the clip - “So I gotta ask, what’s with the outfit?”

Want more musings from Rose? Follow her on Twitter.

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And Now, The Spray-On Skinny Jeans You Never Wanted

Korin Miller
Korin is the site director for Cosmopolitan.com. She loves uncovering cool new research and learning more about what makes guys tick. Outside the Cosmo office, you can find her running with her dog, trying to convince friends to go to karaoke bars, and watching as much reality TV as humanly possible. Hit her up on Twitter: @korinmiller
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Michelle Ruiz
Michelle is the news editor for Cosmopolitan.com. She's obsessed with interviewing celebrities and spotting the latest pop culture trends. Her life highlights include chatting with Ryan Gosling about sex dolls, dancing on stage at the Oprah show, and shopping with her mom on Long Island. Tweet her: @michelleruiz
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Dara Adeeyo
Dara is the associate web editor for Cosmopolitan.com. She's intrigued by all things digital. Dara loves playing with html and discovering new studies. When she's not reading up on the latest cocktail recipes (for work, of course), she can be found breaking it down on the dance floor or watching the Investigative Discovery channel. She also has a sick obsession with nail polish, elephants, and most importantly, Nutella. Dara basically lives on Twitter, so tweet at her and say hey: @dadeeyo.
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Elisa Benson
Elisa Benson is the senior editor of social media for @Cosmopolitan?so, yes, she tweets about sex for a living. Elisa grew up in Ohio, attended Colgate University, and wrote love and relationship advice for Seventeen before graduating to Cosmo. She lives for girly things (weddings and eyelash extensions and Pretty Little Liars?) and frequently tweets about all of the above: @elisabenson.
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10 Weird Things You Never Knew About Orgasm

Did you know that a woman was able to orgasm just by having her eyebrow stroked? Or that some pig farmers use vibrators on their female animals for better breeding?

All of this delightful information is brought to light by best-selling science author Mary Roach in her famous Ted Talk, "Ten Things You Didn’t Know About Orgasm."

In compiling research for her award-winning book Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex, she learned all kinds of amazing things. Read on and check out the video to find out what they are...

1. A fetus can masturbate in utero. It's been documented by radiologists.

2. You Don’t Need Genitals. Since orgasm is a reflex of your nervous system, it can be triggered on parts outside the gonads—like, for example, the knee. According to a case report, one woman had an orgasm every time she brushed her teeth. The woman was so confused that she thought she was possessed by demons and decided to stop brushing her teeth and switched to mouthwash instead! Tsk, tsk, what a shame.

3. You Can "O" When You’re (Legally) Dead. The headquarters for orgasm is along the spinal nerve, something called the sacral nerve root. If you stimulate that area with an electrode on the precise spot, you will trigger an orgasm. You can spark spinal reflexes in legally dead people (who may be brain dead but having beating hearts.)

4. Orgasm can cause bad breath. An hour after sex, "a slight seminal odor" can be detected on the breath of a woman, according to so-called semen connoisseur Theodore van de Velde.

5. Orgasm can cure hiccups. There have been actual articles on the topic, suggesting "unattached hiccuppers can try masturbation".

6. Doctors once prescribed orgasm for fertility. In the early 1900's, gynos believed the contractions of on orgasm could "suck" semen up the vagina to fertilize the egg. Truth: It was called the "upsuck theory."

7. Pig farmers still do. Farmers will sometimes sexually stimulate and massage pig’s vaginas while they shoot them up with sperm because it increases the chances of successful breeding.

8. Female animals are having more fun than you think. Pig farmers also use vibrating inseminators. Holla!

9. There was an instrument developed in lab studies— a camera attached to a phallus—to study what happens inside a woman’s vagina when she climaxes. Sadly, the device has since been mismantled.

10. Dr. Alfred Kinsey conducted an experiment in which he lined men up next to each other and had them ejaculate in order to study how far semen can shoot. The winner was 8 feet!

Photo Credit: istockphoto

Want more musings from Rose? Follow her on Twitter.

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Role Play Ideas You've Never Tried Before

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7 Things Guys Never Notice During Sex

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Hand Job Techniques He’ll Never Forget

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Give Him a Sexy Lap Dance He'll Never Forget

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25 Iconic <em>Cosmo</em> Covers You've Never Seen Before

Helen Gurley Brown's first cover as editor-in-chief of Cosmo.

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You May Never Have to Go Underwear Shopping Again

If you dread going underwear shopping like we do then listen up. This cool, new Netflix-like system for purchasing guchies, called MeUndies, delivers chic new styles to you once a month. How does it work? We thought you’d never ask.

First, log in through Facebook or sign up as a member at meundies.com.

Select “Men’s” (if you're shopping for your guy) or “Women’s” (if you're shopping for you) and then choose from the choice of styles you’re presented with—for women: pick thong, boy short, or briefs; for men: click boxer brief, trunk, or briefs. Then, pick your size.

After browsing through your underwear options (btw—all of them are made from modal, a super-soft fabric, and offered in a slew of colors), choose to buy just one pair—or sign up for a subscription service, which sends products quarterly at a 20 percent discount, lowering prices from $20 a pair to $16 a piece. (FYI: If you opt for the latter, you can skip any month during the first five days at no charge and pause and cancel the automatic delivery at any time.)

Finish up at checkout and in a few days you'll have a new pair or pairs of undies delivered to your doorstep.

Oh, and if you aren’t happy, MeUndies offers a money-back guarantee. You don’t have to send the panties back but you will get reimbursed.

We love this new concept—so convenient!

What do you think? Will you be signing up ASAP?

Photo: MeUndies

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10 Things You Should Never Say to a Guy

These days there’s more than one way to feed your Cosmo fix. You can get your subscription to the print magazine as you always have, or if you’d prefer to get it sent to you as a digital edition to read on your iPad, tablet, or Nook, we’ve got you covered. And, when you just can’t get enough Cosmo, we’ll give you even more—check out our Sex Position of the Day app for your iPhone or Android-enabled device. Now how’s that for a turn-on?

See More Meet Your New Best Friend

CFG: Cosmo For Guys is an iPad app for men—but it’s really for you. That’s because it’ll teach your guy exactly how you
want to be touched, treated, and talked to,
in and out of bed.

See More

From Cosmopolitan.com. Visit Amazon Beauty Ceneter here

10 Things You Should Never Say to a Guy

These days there’s more than one way to feed your Cosmo fix. You can get your subscription to the print magazine as you always have, or if you’d prefer to get it sent to you as a digital edition to read on your iPad, tablet, or Nook, we’ve got you covered. And, when you just can’t get enough Cosmo, we’ll give you even more—check out our Sex Position of the Day app for your iPhone or Android-enabled device. Now how’s that for a turn-on?

See More Meet Your New Best Friend

CFG: Cosmo For Guys is an iPad app for men—but it’s really for you. That’s because it’ll teach your guy exactly how you
want to be touched, treated, and talked to,
in and out of bed.

See More

From Cosmopolitan.com. Visit Amazon Beauty Ceneter here