Twit Sh*t: Katy Perry Has the Key to the Universe

I like to look at Twitter feeds and decide if I would want to be friends with a person based on their last 10 tweets. The answer is always "no." Here are eight famous people I don't want to be friends with.

Katy Perry

The bad news: there is no key to the universe. The good news: it was never locked.

— Katy Perry (@katyperry) February 28, 2014

This is the equivalent of the end of like, every children’s movie or book ever where the kid was given something “magic” and then realized the power was inside them all along, and they just needed encouragement.

Justin Bieber

I love sleep

— Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) February 26, 2014

Dude, no one’s going to complain if you get more of it. Maybe consider hibernating. Maybe look into hibernating for several years or decades. Please.

Miley Cyrus

I would rather choke on my own tongue pic.twitter.com/fVUQTCwrb9

— Miley Ray Cyrus (@MileyCyrus) February 24, 2014

I get Miley’s stance on this, but that doesn’t change the fact that I would love to hate-watch classic fairy tales with people grinding all up on each other. Please reconsider.

Avril Lavigne

Trying to put together new singles and videos now while I'm on tour. It's not easy. I'm doing my best for you all. Working at it now. :)

— Avril Lavigne (@AvrilLavigne) February 27, 2014

HURRY THIS DECADE NEEDS IT’S OWN SK8ER BOI

Pitbull

if you look for something, it hides

— Pitbull (@pitbull) February 27, 2014

In a few more weeks, Pitbull will realize this is just everyone trying to avoid him.

Ryan Seacrest

Happy 44th mom and dad pic.twitter.com/ulGfO0hDkH

— Ryan Seacrest (@RyanSeacrest) February 21, 2014

In case you were wondering who was responsible for bringing Ryan Seacrest into this world. On purpose. On purpose.

Ashley Tisdale

It's Appreciation Monday (I just made that up) so I want to give a shout out to all my awesome fans, thank you for all ur love. I feel it :)

— Ashley Tisdale (@ashleytisdale) February 24, 2014

Alright, one, you’re forcing it, and two, this isn’t even catchy. Mindfulness Monday? Yeah, that’s a stretch too, but at least I put thirty seconds worth of effort into coming up with it.

Famous Anagrams Bonus Tweet

LENA DUNHAM is an anagram of ANAL MUD HEN

— Famous Anagrams (@FamousAnagrams) February 27, 2014

I dunno, I can’t argue with this, I guess?

Photo Credit: Getty

Frank's last 10 tweets will make you not want to be friends with him, either.

From Cosmopolitan.com. Visit Amazon Beauty Center here