Time to Get Hit With a Hot Stick

March 26, 2012 at 6:16PM By Jessica Knoll | Humpday cannot come soon enough—on Wednesday night, there is a big Amherst gathering (where I went to college) at a bar owned by an alumni. I stalked the bejesus out of the Facebook guest list, and am giddy over the fact that this guy, Trevor, who I secretly crushed on junior and senior year, is going to be there. Ugh, he is so freaking sexy. But because I wasted most of my college career on a guy who broke up with me to explore other vaginas, excuse me, New York City, Trevor and I never engaged in anything more than a mild flirtation. He is the polar opposite of my ex—Eric is blondish and rocks his Sperry’s sans socks (I know!), and Trevor is like this artsy fartsy musician type who would probably serenade me with his guitar after we have passionate, intense sex on his bedroom floor (because we were so consumed with lust for each other that we couldn’t make it to the bed, obviously).

Trevor hasn’t seen me since Eric and I broke up, and honestly, I doubt he knows I’m single now or that I’m still carrying a torch for him. We became friendly-ish in college after ending up in Acting II together—I was there to fulfill an English requirement (yes I am aware it is utter BS that an acting class where you play Tag and Murder counted towards my degree), he was there because he is actually super talented and was looking to “work on his craft.” We were assigned to perform a scene together, and lots of late night rehearsing and “accidental” hip grazing ensued. After the semester ended, we didn’t see much of each other, but would talk and hang out and have eye sex whenever we did cross paths.

I am agonizing over what to wear to this thing. I just got these waxed red jeans, which look like leather and are totally badass, but I have no idea what to wear with them. I’ve always had a strong opposition to black and red, but then I saw Amanda Seyfried rocking her crimson denim with a black top, and because Amanda and I are practically twinsies, I’m coming around to it. Also—hair, wavy or straight? I only just figured out how to use a curling iron without making myself look like the little girl in Knocked Up, and I want Trevor to think I’m as new and improved and make-outable as possible. I consulted Ashley, and her two cents is that if I wear heels, I shouldn’t do waves, because it will seem like I’m trying too hard, and I think she’s right considering the venue (the bar is on the casual side, AKA drinks are served in plastic cups and there is definitely pee on the bathroom floor). So this is going to be the look: Straight hair, red jeans, flowy black tank, black leather jacket, and black booties. Guard your loins (or not), Trevor, I’m coming for ya!

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