12 Problems Only People Dating a Coworker Understand

1. The devastating awkwardness of figuring out if you should kiss each other good-bye. As your relationship begins to blossom like two flowers in the same garden that are dating each other, you have to start making choices that will affect you the rest of your lives (or until you break up and/or one of you quits). Do you kiss each other good-bye every day and risk the glares, murmurs, and gossip of your coworkers? Or do you just suck it up and bolt out of there, sending a "thinking of you" text on the way out? This is about to set the foundation for the rest of the relationship.

2. Debating whether or not to send that inappropriate email. You've hovered over the "send" button, wondering if you should send a sexy email to your work beau so you can reap the benefits later. Then you thought better of it when you realized his boss could be looking over his shoulder at this very moment.

3. Negotiating a quickie during lunch. You crunched the numbers over sushi and realized that you could spend 15 minutes in a car together in a nearby empty lot before anyone noticed both of you were out on a long lunch. Steamy, passionate, forbidden, afternoon delight was expected. Awkward, fumbling sex and cramping ensued.

4. Feeling obligated to take lunch with them every. Single. Day. Depending on the kind of person you are, that sentence either gave you butterflies or filled you with intense dread. May God have mercy on your souls if the two of you disagree about just how much time you should spend together.

5. And if you live together, being together nonstop. Jim and Pam made the whole office romance thing seem perfect, but sometimes you just want some space.

6. If you're not working a 9-to-5, just hoping you wind up on the same schedule. You're always bummed out when your schedules don't overlap, but you're pretty sure your manager does it on purpose. And getting home when he's just leaving for work means no sex ever.

7. Fighting over interoffice politics. You know you shouldn't bring your work home, but dates have been ruined because his department really screwed over your department on some big project.

8. Your coworkers acting really awkward when they walk in on the two of you. You might have been discussing budget reports, but everyone always acts like they just interrupted something steamy. "Ohhh, I'm so sorry, you guys," they say with a wink and leave before you can explain yourselves.

9. Overcompensating with professionalism. When you have to interact in a professional setting, you fidget and act like you're complete strangers, successfully making things even more awkward for everyone involved. As a result, you are never invited to client meetings together.

10. The grand debate over whether to leave the office separately for date night. You know if you walk out together, everyone is going to "Ooooh" like they're the studio audience on Saved by the Bell.

11. Seeing each other at work when you're having a big fight at home. You might be able to storm out of the house but you're not going to get a break from each other when you have that big PowerPoint presentation the next day. Good luck going through the quarterly results when the person you're currently irrationally mad at because of how they make pasta is stewing only feet away.

12. Hating him momentarily when you're up for the same promotion. You sat down and had a long talk about how you'll be happy no matter who gets it. But secretly, you're hoping to stroll in there and crush your significant other.

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How to Date a Coworker

Cory Monteith and Leah Michele are coupled-up.

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If you're crushing on a colleague, you're not alone: A CareerBuilder.com survey found that 40 percent of workers have dated someone on the job during their career, proving that it's a hookup hot spot, albeit one with parameters. Just coupled up with a coworker like Glee costars Lea Michele and Cory Monteith or are thinking about making a move? Check out our advice for turning a flirtation into a potential relationship.

TESTING THE WATERS
It's a good idea to suss out whether your work crush has the hots for you too. Some tip-offs: If he starts hanging around your work space a lot or asks you to grab lunch or after-work drinks, says Stephanie Losee, coauthor of Office Mate.

It's also promising if he's in an unrelated department yet asks your opinion on a project of his — it indicates that he is looking for an excuse to talk to you and values your opinion, notes Losee.

You can do your own digging by jokingly saying, "Everyone thinks we're seeing each other, ha-ha. Crazy, right?" If he casts a wide grin or seems into the idea, the coast is clear to start flirting and see what happens.

AVOID GETTING BUSTED
Once you've gotten together (we know you'll get this thing moving), keep that info on the DL. "If it turns out to be a two-week fling, nobody needs to know about it," says Helaine Olen, coauthor of Office Mate. And monitor how often you bring him up. Olen says coworkers often guess something is going on when one person mentions the other too frequently. For example, "Here's that report...John helped with the graphics" or "Where'd you go for lunch? Oh, John loves that place."

But if you were chummy before, don't ignore him now — that draws more attention than the occasional friendly moments does. No matter how covert you are, people are likely to catch on, but there's no need to broadcast it.

WHEN TO COME CLEAN
Most companies are lenient about dating (except between supervisors and their subordinates), says Lois Frankel, PhD, author of Stop Sabotaging Your Career. "They recognize its ubiquity." But there may be rules about whom you have to inform and when.

If it gets serious (i.e., several months), it's wise to tell your boss—even if you don't have to—before she hears it from someone else, notes Frankel. Just say "I wanted to let you know Brad and I are dating. We'll be sure not to let it interrupt our work."

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Read This Before You Start Dating a Coworker

Where They Met: "Mr. & Mrs. Smith"

Dating Rule: Try waiting until you're not directly working on a project together to officially test the relationship waters, says Nicole Williams, author of Girl On Top: Your Guide to Turning Dating Rules Into Career Success. Angie and Brad reportedly began seeing each other only after Mr. & Mrs. Smith wrapped, which made it easier to focus on work (and reduced the odds of crazy-bad tension if things hadn't worked out).

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